As God as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly.

A longer post tomorrow, but in honor of Thanksgiving, I’d like to share this link. One of the funniest TV sitcom episodes of all time was from WKRP in the late 1970s. One season, their Thanksgiving episode featured a promotion of releasing life turkeys from a helicopter. The result was a true TV classic, and one of the great lines of TV comedy. “As God as my witness, I thought turkeys could fly.”

If you don’t have the patience to watch the entire episode, wade through the initial commercials and then fast-forward to around 22 minutes or so.  Great stuff!

http://www.hulu.com/watch/322

Advertisement

‘Tonight’

I am an absolute sucker for the various Independence Day concerts that are televised on PBS and the commercial networks. So I watched both the Washington, DC concert (PBS) and the Boston Pops (CBS) last night.

If you missed the Washington concert, you may want to watch and listen to this incredible duet by Kelli O’Hara and Matthew Morrison (Glee) of “Tonight” from West Side Story.  It was so good, it sent chills down my spine. The clip starts with a solo performance by Morrison. The duet begins at roughly 4:26.

Didn’t we just watch this show?

We probably watch entirely too much TV around our house, and the Monday night CBS sitcom lineup has been one of our favorites.

It has been diminished somewhat by the move of both The Big Bang Theory and Rules of Engagement to Thursday night.

Last night CBS premiered a new sitcom in the 8:30 (Eastern) slot previously occupied by Rules of Engagement.

Mad Love immediately followed How I Met Your Mother, and if I hadn’t been paying close attention, I would have thought it was one continuous program. CBS is rather blatantly making a near carbon copy of How I Met Your Mother. I can’t say that I blame them — Mother has been a ratings success — but you’d think there were some writers and producers out there with a little more originality.

Mad Love deals with a group of young, attractive, professionals, living in Manhattan and falling in and out of love. Sounds exactly like the show that’s on immediately before it. 

One of the two female leads in Mad Love, Sarah Chalke, was actually a multi-episode guest star in How I Met Your Mother.

Roseanne's little girl, all grown up -- Sarah Chalke

She was the long-term love interest of Mother’s Ted, played by Josh Radnor.

By the way, her love interest in Mad Love is Jason Biggs, who could be Radnor’s brother.

Mad Love's Jason Biggs

How I Met Your Mother's Josh Radnor

Coincidence? Yeah, right.

‘Why don’t I have a mother?’

Last week it was same-sex-marriages. This week it is same-sex-parents.

I heard on NPR this morning that actor Neal Patrick Harris (Doogie Howser) and his partner have gotten together with a surrogate mother to produce a set of twins (who are yet to be born.)

Neal Patrick Harris (l) and partner David Burtka

I’m not a homophobe. I really couldn’t care less what someone does in the privacy of their bedroom, so long as they aren’t hurting someone else. That’s the problem I have with this trend of gay and lesbian couples having children. There is potential harm.

I believe both mothers and fathers matter to children. Children absorb and learn different things from the different genders. In this case, why would you go through an incredible amount of effort and expense to create a child who will not have a mother? Did your mother not play an important part in your life? Why would you deny your child the benefit of having both a mother and a father?

The nephew of some of our friends went through the same process about a year ago. The two guys ended up with twin girls. While I’m sure these two guys will love and care for their daughters to the maximum extent of which they are capable, but they are limited biologically in what they can provide. Neither is female. The two girls will be raised without a mother or mother-figure. How will that affect the girls? I don’t know, but it can’t be ideal.

It seems like an incredible act of self indulgence. The same-sex parents get a baby to play with, but the child is the one who is missing one parent.

Of course, in today’s climate of “starter marriages,” “no-fault pregnancies” and high rates of divorce, missing parents are all too common with “straight” families.  The difference is that, usually, the parents do not plan to make it that way from the outset.

I feel the same about single women who elect to have a baby without benefit of a functioning father?  I don’t understand the benefit to the child of not having a father.  I guess some mothers really think you are going to be so good as a parent that they can fill both roles. Some of the time, and maybe even most of the time, many parents I know feel they stretching their abilities to handle one job, let alone two.

It may sound contradictory, but I don’t have any problem with gays or lesbians adopting children. Why? Because usually they are improving the lot of a child. By adopting, they are providing a child with a set of parents. While a male-female set of parents would be ideal, same-sex parents are better than no parents at all.

The question is simply this: In the grand scheme of things, is a would-be parent’s desire to have a child of greater importance than that child’s need for both a mother and a father? It’s something to think about.

Ironically, Harris is also the star of the CBS sitcom, “How I Met Your Mother.” That is one story he won’t have to tell his real-life kids.

Children, cover your ears!

I have posted on this subject before, but after watching my favorite Monday night sitcoms on CBS last night, it is worth another entry. The former “Tiffany network” should really be ashamed of what they broadcast during the early evening hours when children are watching.

I love the comedy lineup — How I Met Your Mother, Rules of Engagement, Two and a Half Men and The Big Bang Theory. However, I’m an adult. I am very glad I don’t have young children with control of the remote on Monday evening. It used to be you could rely on the major networks to be at least sensitive to young ears and a little respectable during the early evening hours. The adult stuff was saved for later, when the kids were in bed. That is the case no more.

A good example is “Rules of Engagement,” which I dearly love. If I am not home for some reason, I’ll definitely record it. I laugh out loud at some of the jokes. But I no longer have small children who might ask questions about scenes like this.

Engaged young couple Adam and Jennifer are discussing a birthday present Adam just gave Jennifer. She jokingly accuses him of getting the present just so he can get some sex. Adam readily agrees and begins to walk to the bedroom.

When Jennifer doesn’t follow, he turns around and asks her, “You did mean right now, didn’t you?”

Jennifer looks down at her short dress and replies, “Oh what the heck. I AM wearing a skirt.”

I can just imagine the questions an elementary school aged girl might ask her mother about that one.

The following show, “Two and a Half Men,” is nothing but an on-going sex joke, but last night it stooped to a new low for any family viewing.  Charlie and his girlfriend, Chelsea, pretty much spent the entire episode naked in bed.

Chelsea and Charlie out of bed

The plot centered on Charlie being unhappy about not being able to give Chelsea an orgasm. It wasn’t just an aside reference. It was the main plot of the program. Much of the episode’s dialogue centered around Charlie’s efforts to sexually satisfy his girlfriend.

“Mommy, what’s an orgasm? Can I get one for my birthday?”

I wonder how many adults CBS thinks are available to watch their programs at 8:30 and 9:00 pm(Eastern) without children around also. Could it be another reason the major networks’ ratings continue to decline?

We used to joke that TV was so backward and censured during the days when Ozzie and Harriet slept in separate twin beds. Maybe that wasn’t so bad.

French burkas, racial profiling and the Tebow-Super Bowl flap

Listening to the news on the radio while I drive to work is a great source of inspiration for blog material.

As a sign I saw in a gift shop recently said, “Everyone is entitled to my own opinion.”

They are fighting over burkas in France these days. Those are the robes for Muslim women that cover their entire body including their face. France is considering banning them in public buildings, citing subjugation of women and security as the reasons. Naturally, those on the other sides are yelling about freedom of religion and France’s national identity. It’s interesting how Muslim leaders will cry for religious freedom when they are in the minority. However, try to wear a tee-shirt with “What would Jesus do?” written on it and see how far you get in the streets of Saudi Arabia or Iran. I suspect the mullahs would be singing another tune.

*     *     *     *

A bill is scheduled to be introduced into the Georgia General Assembly today that would outlaw racial profiling. I am ambivalent about this issue.

On one hand, I don’t think someone should be arrested or harassed because of the color of their skin. ie: driving while black, etc.

On the other hand, crime is a serious issue in Savannah. Even out in our little suburban enclave, it is something to be concerned with. And at least here in Savannah, the vast, overwhelming majority of street crimes (assault, robbery, burglary, etc.) are committed by African Americans, primarily young, male African Americans. A story in yesterday’s local newspaper described arrest activity from the weekend and showed the mugs of the 12 people arrested. Ten of the twelve were black men. Unfortunately, this is not an anomaly. This brings me back to the initial question:  Do I want to take away from the police one tool that might help them keep myself, my home and my family safe?  I don’t know.

*     *     *     *

Our favorite-son quarterback, Tim Tebow, is taking hits this week, and not just at the Senior Bowl practice in Mobile. He and his mom are going to appear in a anti-abortion Super Bowl commercial paid for by the Christian advocacy group “Focus on the Family.” Supposedly, the ad will have Tim and his mom talking about her experience when pregnant with Tim. As the story goes, she had a difficult pregnancy and was advised to terminate the pregnancy for her health. She refused to do so, and the end result is Tim, a remarkable young man by any standard.

I am not a big fan of Focus on the Family, for what little I know about them. Nor have I seen the TV spot, but then again, neither had anyone else.

Nonetheless, the Women’s Media Center, with backing from the National Organization for Women, the Feminist Majority and other groups, are throwing the penalty flags in Tim’s and CBS’s direction.

“An ad that uses sports to divide rather than to unite has no place in the biggest national sports event of the year – an event designed to bring American’s together,” said Jemhu Greene, president of the Women’s Media Center.

“…an event designed to bring American’s together”??? I thought it was an event designed to determine the champion of the National Football League, provide an excuse for some Sunday afternoon parties and to make a lot of money for a bunch of people. I never knew it was supposed to be some kind of national unity event. Silly me.

I wonder if Ms. Greene has ever been to a viewing party or a football game where there were decent percentages of fans of both team? (Super Bowl, Florida-Georgia, Texas-Oklahoma, a BCS championship game, etc.)  I suspect she has not. If she had ever actually been to one of those games, she would know that unity is not a concept that comes to mind.

I don’t believe the women’s advocacy group really have much to complain about except that the Tebows’ message will probably be something they will disagree with.

The funniest shot comes from SI.com’s Greg Doyel.

“If you’re a sports fan, and I am, that’s the holiest day of the year,” he wrote. “It’s not a day to discuss abortion. For it, against it, I don’t care what you are. On Super Sunday, I don’t care what I am. Feb. 7 is simply not the day to have that discussion.”

The irony is just pure honey. According to Doyel, Super Bowl Sun– “Thou shalt keep holy the Lord’s…” –day is too holy to be despoiled by any talk of morals, ethics, or, God forbid, religion. No further comment is necessary.

For myself, it just gives me something to look forward to watching the game.

“Filthy whores” and “Super Sperm,” the “Tifanny Network” at its best

We watch a lot of TV, probably too much. Last night we were watching our usual Monday night comedies on CBS.

How I Met Your Mother

Rules of Engagement

Two and a Half Men

While I was chuckling over the jokes, I was also feeling very happy I didn’t have any small children watching with me. The shows were full of humor – very adult humor. And those were shows that aired at 8 o’clock eastern time. That’s 7 pm in central time. In either case, it was plenty early enough to expect droves of younger children to be watching.

I’m not a prude. I do remember when the network censors wouldn’t allow Lucy and Desi or Ozzie and Harriet to share the same bed. I remember thinking how weird that was. “Aren’t married people supposed to sleep in the same bed?” This wasn’t Ozzie and Harriet or My Three Sons by a long shot.

The main plot of How I Met Your Mother revolved around one of the main characters confessing to his friends that he and his girlfriend had not had sex yet, although they had been dating for five months.

The drought ended at 8:25 pm.

Then it turned out that the girlfriend had not had sex in five years. The dialogue all revolved around the disbelief of the group of friends that anyone could go that long without sex. Not a very sophisticated plot, but it was cute — for adults. I can imagine a six year old asking “Mommy, what does it mean when somebody hasn’t had sex for five years?” (I won’t give the obvious bad punch line.)

Or to draw off of another line from the show, “Mommy, what is a filthy little whore?”

The second show is one of my favorites,“Rules of Engagement.

Rules of Engagement

The main plot revolved around one of the key couples undergoing fertility testing. There were lots of jokes about guys’ “junk.” At one point, the husband of the fertility pair discovers he has “super sperm” and that becomes the focus of the last half of the show. It was a funny script and well carried by the cast. I laughed, but I’m looking at it with adult eyes, not those of a five, six or seven year old.

“Mommy, what’s super sperm?”

I would look to say that these shows were some kind of anomaly, but that isn’t the case. You see them all the time.

I won’t take any shots at Two and a Half Men. That would be too easy. the entire premise of the show is a running series of sex-related, sophomoric jokes and skits. (That may be why I enjoy it!)  At least it airs at 9 pm on the net. However, in this market the Fox station has picked it up in syndication and airs it at 630 pm. So much for what used to be called “the family hour.”

I don’t suggest that we should revert back to the early ‘60’s. Nor am I advocating any kind of censorship.  My concern is not with the shows’ content, but the early time slot they are aired. How about a little discretion in the early evening?  It makes you wonder; would the CBS network execs like to sit and watch those shows with their young grandchildren? It might be interesting to ask.